Life in 3D

A disturbance in the force

Maybe it’s something about being a conservative that the liberals can sense but I was standing in the grocery store the other day getting the essentials, since our apartment is still pretty much bare when it comes to things like food and drink, and the guy in front of me kept looking at me. Now, I don’t mean that he stood over there and I stood over here and we just looked at each other and went about our way, oh no, nothing like that at all. I get in line behind him and he does that half turn to see who’s behind him and when he sees me he turns forward again real quick like I had threatened him or something. 

He was the standard issue hippie too, tie-dyed shirt, jeans with holes in the knees, and Birkenstock sandals. I think he was buying some organic crap or something. I didn’t care; I had my milk, bread, and some stuff for dinner so I ignored him. But then he keeps glancing back at me and each time the look gets more and more hostile.

All I can think is that he sensed that I was a conservative through some mystic connection to his karma or something because I was wearing a plain shirt, jeans and sneakers. I didn’t even have my Fred Thompson shirt on that says “Secure the borders; Kill the terrorists; punch the hippies” 

So he glares at me ‘mad dog’ style as he’s walking out of the store which I figure was the safest thing for him to do because he was so skinny and frail looking that I think I could used him for barbell curls. But then, as I leave the store, some other long hair hippie type starts glaring at me too like I’m carrying an assault rifle and randomly shooting people.

I’ll tell you, I guess a short haircut around the Woodstock wannabes must just set them off or something because they were just freaky. So I went and got a haircut, I was due for one anyway.