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Cuddle Parties?

May 11th, 2008 Posted in wimps, WTF

Apparently there is a segment of the population who needs to get in touch with their ‘inner child’ or, have not fully embraced their inner furry yet so they go instead to cuddle parties. What is a cuddle party you ask? Well, pop on over to Michelle Malkin and she can explain.

Three years ago, I blogged about an inane trend called “cuddle parties.”Yes, it’s as ridiculous as it sounds: A bunch of adults in pajamas getting in touch with their touchy-feely inner selves by snuggling up and spooning with strangers. (I know: Sounds like something the press corps groupies are dying to have with Barack Obama.)

All I can do is respond in my best Dr. Cox voice to this stupidity:

Oh. My. God, Nancy! I know that you never, ever really recovered from that fact that your parents didn’t get you that Barbie dream house you wanted for your 10thbirthday and that no one understands how much that scarred you, and while you TRIED and TRIED to make daddy love you just as much as he loved that guy Steve who he always went with on those long weekends, he never, never did.  Mom always said they went hunting but you wondered why they never took any guns with them but she didn’t seemed to mind because she spent the weekend tanked up on Valiums and vodka while bringing home strange men who were always your ‘daddy for the weekend’ so now you’re trying to recapture that lost magic you once had by curling up with a bunch of complete strangers in flannel but here’s a news flash – grow the hell up.

In a world full of Brittney’s and parents who have to find a babysitter so they can get to the prom this self indulgent crap is so far off the deep end that I have no words to describe how incredibly stupid it is. If you were to take every utterance by Michael Moore, combine it with almost every thought by Al Frankin and then top the whole thing off with Operation: Code Pink, it would STILL not equal the level of narcissistic, childish and 100% dumbass stupidity that this represents. So, take off the diapers and your footie pajamas and quit sucking your thumb and start acting like an adult.

2 Responses to “Cuddle Parties?”

  1. Michael Says:


    I can’t wrap my brain around that $#!+.

    Again I say, WTF?

  2. Jennifer Says:

    I can’t wait to get invited to one of these. I could confuse it with a taser party. Maybe a violent shock would break loose a repressed memory of actually being spanked as a child and turn them into productive members of society. Hey, electroshock therapy is still an accepted psychiatric treatment.

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